Lies Wives Believe

Lie #1: Marriage Is All About Love

Tale as old as time:

• Boy meets girl.
• Boy falls in love with girl.
• Boy proposes to girl.
• Boy marries girl.
• Boy and girl live happily ever after.

But what if it wasn’t love?  What if it was indigestion?  And what happens to a marriage based on love when that love wanes?

The Storybook Romance

Once upon a time, marriages were determined by parents and involved long courtships.  The couple had little input and they were taught that they had to love one another—unconditionally love that other person.  They had to grow to have feelings for them, or if they never had feelings for them they still had to stay with that person.

Today, through a steady diet of movies and television shows, our culture believes that marriage is entirely based on the feeling of being “in love”—something that can come and go throughout any relationship.

Marriage Is About A Promise

But marriage isn’t about love, or feeling “in love”, marriage has always been about a promise.  The promises that are found in the vows that are exchanged.  Vowing to love, honor and cherish.  Vowing to be with the other person no matter what happens.  That’s what marriage is all about.

The lie that we’ve been fed is a nasty one, because it gives cover to the person in the couple to break their promise when times get difficult (and times usually get difficult).  The vows that are made need to mean more than just trifle utterances or things that are said when “in love”.  They need to be things that we can’t go back on.

Only then will we have strong marriages that stand for years.